In Sophie's Choice, a Polish woman must make the impossible choice of saving only one of her two children. On last night's (October 1) Tonight ShowMiley Cyrus was forced to cast an equally unthinkable vote: pot or glitter?

In a web-exclusive segment from the episode above, Miley's tasked with answering fan-submitted "Would You Rather?" questions. Though she's a fan of recreational drug use and shiny decorations ("You really know how to crush my soul," she laments), she finally—after much consideration—sides with the former. Sorry, sparkles.

And for the record, she'd also listen to one song for the rest of her life over no music at all, sneeze tiny giraffes instead of be sneezed on by a giant giraffe and eat the same thing for the rest of her life (Cracker Barrel dumplings) before receiving a variety of meals via baby-bird delivery.

"That one sounds suspect," Cyrus observes. No arguments.

And though the game sheds light on the true Miley, she and show host Jimmy Fallon give their best contrived performances in his "Emotional Interview" segment above. As part of the game, the interviewer and interviewee receive direction on how they must act (defensive, insincerely polite), and when they're instructed to one-up each other, all bets are off.

"It's funny, 'cause I just got named Sexiest Man Alive," Jimmy offers. But Miley, who's committed to coming out on top, pulls out all the stops to match him.

"Well, it's really funny, because I am a freakin' bunny," she says while applying a veil that looks like an accessory from a Watership Down-themed wedding. Just when you think you've got her a little pegged...

Watch Miley bring the laughs to the Tonight Show, and be sure to check her out as host and musical guest of the season premiere of Saturday Night Live tomorrow (October 3) at 11:30 PM EST on NBC!

A supercut of Miley Cyrus twerking? Sure, why not!

Miley's Wild 2015 VMAs Looks