The One Direction television special that aired tonight (Dec. 23) was -- to borrow a phrase from the tattoo on Liam Payne's forearm -- everything we ever wanted, but nothing that we'll ever need.

Alright, that's a mere half-truth, because now that we've seen the special in all its boy band glory, we've come to realize we needed it more than our vital organs need oxygen. As part of their whirlwind promo tour for their latest album, 'Four,' the boys shut down the entirety of Universal Studios in Florida, invited some fans to check out the park, listen to some killer performances and revel in the simple beauty that is One Direction. We have to admit: when we think about the fact that we were not present for that set of days, jealousy is not a word strong enough for the emotion we're feeling. Absolute and total, crippling despair is probably a closer match.

Our favorite part of the performances? If we can't count every time Zayn Malik's iridescent face and Louis Tomlinson's perfectly disheveled locks appeared across our screen, the stage's shape -- the number four -- completely did us in. Get it? Because their album is called 'Four.' If we had to take a wild guess as to who thought that one up, we'd put our bets on Harry Styles. But, hold on, let's go back to Zayn for a second, shall we?

Zayn had been out sick for the first day of promo, existing somewhere across the pond while unfounded rumors of substance abuse began circulating. He quickly put those rumors to rest simply by showing up the next day, looking every part the rockstar boy of our teenage fantasies come to life. Zayn dominated the screen, our hearts, our minds, those Doc Martens he was wearing. Maybe it was that beautiful, doe-eyed look of his that had us entranced. Perhaps it was that white muscle tank he wore during those behind-the-scenes moments. It could be the tattoos. But the truth is this: watching Zayn Malik do vocal warmups is like emerging from a dark, dank cave you've been trapped in your entire life. You heard whispers, rumors, of a world beyond all that -- one filled with goodness and beauty and warmth, but it wasn't until that moment (the moment when you witnessed it for yourself) that you truly believed it. The mere sound of his vibrato, his falsetto, is enough to send us to heaven and back. We are not worthy.

But One Direction is no island; they are nothing if not an amalgamation of the strengths, weaknesses and idiosyncrasies of their five members, so let's cut to one of the best parts of the segment: the time unofficial band patriarch, Liam, interviewed Niall, Harry and Louis on a roller coaster. Note: we will somehow forgive Harry of his mild dislike for roller coasters, because he powered through the pain, anyway. (The same cannot be said for Zayn, but we will forgive anyone who looks like a modern-day Adonis of nearly anything, anyway.) The interview was a great opportunity for fans to see just how much the members of One Direction know about each other. Did you know Harry's first word was cat? Because Niall knew. Check out the full segment above.

Speaking of Niall, fans of his were certainly not left for wanting: those rumors about Niall recording naked? After tonight, we officially believe them. The special ran rampant with clips of the boisterous blonde -- shirtless and pant-less, singing and laying about pool tables. But don't just take our word for it. You can check out the (nearly!) bare-bodied beauty in the slightly NFSW clip below:

And as though that weren't enough -- to be serenaded by your favorite pop group, to get access to Universal Studios in the evening, to be breathing the same air as One Direction, etc., the boys decided to take it a step further by surprising fans throughout the park: suddenly and without warning. It was the ultimate personification of their vastly underrated 'Take Me Home' track 'Heart Attack.' From Louis showing up to surprise fans at 'Harry Potter' world, to Niall's sudden appearance forcing a girl to slide slowly down the Honeydukes counter (like the saddest part of every romantic comedy we've ever seen) to Liam and Harry surprising fans in a theatre -- it was equal parts sweet dream and beautiful nightmare. Don't believe us? See the clip below!

But what of the performances, you ask? They performed 'Steal My Girl,' 'Night Changes' (note: Liam's falsetto was the most swoon-worthy it's ever been, and considering his track record that's saying something), and 'Best Song Ever,' to name a few. 'Girl Almighty' was a serious highlight (you can check out that video way above), and we're beyond ready to hear it when they tour next year. Even in a song as upbeat and 80s pop as this one proves to be, Harry manages to be a veritable Mick Jaggerian force to be reckoned with in the world of pop heartthrobs and we don’t think we’ll ever get over that growl. Puberty has been kind to One Direction.

Speaking of puberty, of beginnings, as soon as One Direction launched into 'What Makes You Beautiful,' we felt a mixture of total elation and nostalgia. For a band that's been around for less than five years, that probably sounds a bit weird and mildly self-indulgent, but 'What Makes You Beautiful' was the beginning of the end for so many of us: it was our introduction to this band of goofballs, the end of our free will. Little did we know, that catchy pop tune would lead us down a road full of twists and turns and unending torment. From marriage proposals (Zerriage) to breaking records to loving and living for each new social media update: loving them is all consuming.

Oh, One Direction. Promise us you'll be around forever.

See Photos of One Direction Through the Years