Sister-in-Law Furious Grieving Woman Froze Late Husband’s Sperm
A grieving young woman is facing backlash from her sister-in-law who thinks she's "selfish" for freezing her late husband's sperm after he was killed in a car accident.
Sharing her story on Reddit's AITA thread, the anonymous woman explained she and her deceased husband, both in their late twenties, had talked about having children later, assuming they had plenty of time to decide.
Her sister-in-law is a nurse, and after her brother passed away, she requested to look over his medical records and chart information which revealed that sperm was extracted after his passing.
"To say she flipped when she saw the sperm extraction paperwork would be an understatement. She lost her mind screaming at me about it," the widow shared.
"She said a lot, but this is what I remember: She called me selfish for trying to keep a piece of him for myself," the woman wrote in her Reddit post. "I had no right to do this without talking to his family about it. I'm cruel for dragging his loss out by only maybe having his child."
The woman continued, writing that "their mom has been begging me to have children, and I wouldn't," and claiming that the sister-in-law says "to do it like this is disgusting."
The couple had talked about having children and had wills drafted to indicate their mutual decision to extract sperm as long as the wife requested it.
"We're only in our late 20s, and we've been together for ten years. We did talk about this, and he agreed I should do it if I want to," she continued.
However, she is now second-guessing her actions and turning to the internet for advice.
"He was your husband, and I'd argue that you have more right to that decision than any of his blood family. If I were to die, I would want my wife calling the shots on everything. I love my parents and siblings, but my wife is the one who has been my partner in everything," one Reddit user wrote, advising her that she is making the right decisions.
"The sister is probably just overreacting due to the emotional trauma of the loss," a second commented. "She's not an a--hole, either – just cut her some slack while she deals with it but do whatever you need to do for you."
A third Redditor offered some reassurance. "Ultimately, it's something you discussed, and he agreed to. If you didn't extract his sperm and decided down the road that you did want his children, that regret would be a whole other thing to process."
Yet another user weighed in: "His sister's reaction may have been out of line, but she didn't know that it's something he agreed to. Her other comments about it being selfish and cruel are likely just coming from a place of grief. If you do talk to them soon, just clarify that you have consented, and it's not something that would happen in the near future. Any further conversations can happen when you've all had a chance to process the loss."