"Do I have to really eat this?"

Posted by Britney Spears Germany on Friday, January 22, 2016

Before Britney Spears returns to Las Vegas for her remixed, reimagined, still iconic (and now gloriously "Breathe On Me"-filled) Piece Of Me residency, it's time for a little #FBFney for the weekend.

Way, way back in 1999 — back when Brit Brit was just starting to become the American Dream since she was 17 — she flew abroad (REFERENCE) to Japan to promote her debut album ...Baby One More Time, which went on to become one of the biggest selling albums of all time. Living legend...you can look, but don't touch.

While overseas, Brit recorded a series of shout-outs to her adoring fans in Taiwan to thank them for their support, wearing a baby blue button-up and a really cool and funky strand of pink in her hair.

As any avid follower of Godney will surely tell you, the Holy Spearit is not exactly one for natural sounding pre-taped messages — especially when cue cards are involved.

"Hi, happy boys and girls! This is Britney Spears, and do you like my songs and dance? I hope to see you soon in Taiwan. Bye!" she quickly declares in perfect broken English before delivering a signature Dorkney face to fill the awkward silence. (Side note: "Hi, happy boy! Do you like my songs and dance?" is now my new pick-up line. Thanks for that, B!)

Being the exceptional earner that she is, she also very humbly shows off one of her (MANY) platinum plaques.

And that's not all: They made her try snacks. No, not cheesy grits or watermelon bubblegum. Taiwanese snacks!

Her reviews are very on-brand: Beef jerky? "Interesting" and "really good." Biscuit with pineapple? "Cute" and "very good." Dried olives? "Uh...do I have to really eat this?"

As it turns out, Britney isn't much on the olives ("I'll never stop olive-ing you..."), and after some debating with someone off-camera, it turns out that a quick lick will ultimately suffice for the video. "Really tasty and sweet!" she LIES. A master thespian — truly an early indicator of her Crossroads acting chops.

B also briefly plays with a doll, which she says she's excited to add her doll collection back at home. And that's no lie: Have you seen her room back in Kentwood? Also, that laugh at the end!

Over seventeen years later, she's still exactly the same adorably goofy girl.

Shout out to BritneyGermany for the really cool and interesting flashback!

Britney's Best Live Outbursts:

A Throwback to Britney's Crossroads Premieres Around The World: