Woman ‘Insecure’ After Finding Out Boyfriend’s Sexual Body Count: ‘Higher Than I Thought’
A 22-year-old woman on Reddit is feeling "insecure" after discovering her 25-year-old boyfriend's "body count" — i.e. the number of sexual partners he's been with.
"My boyfriend and I have been together for about [two] and a half years. We just told each other our body counts (I know, very late), and his was a lot higher than I thought it was. I feel kind of insecure about it, I’ve only slept with [two] people besides him and his number is a few times that," she wrote.
"I know this is completely a me thing and not an us thing: I love him a lot, it doesn’t change my opinion of him at all, and I know he loves me and has ended up with me for a reason. Plus, the past is the past, everyone has one and I know that," the confused woman continued on Reddit.
She admitted that every time she thinks about how many people her boyfriend slept with before her, she "gets a little sad about it."
"I don’t know if it’s the idea that he’s slept with so many other women, and they’ve seen him in the same way I've seen him and slept in the same spot that I do, or if I'm jealous that I never got to experience hookup culture myself (I know it’s not worth missing, it’s more the experience I'm sort of disappointed I missed out on)," she explained.
While the woman understands she's dealing with her "own insecurities" and that her boyfriend didn't do anything wrong, she can't help but feel "upset over it."
"I know it is something that will heal with time, our relationship is great otherwise and we really do love each other. But man, it really has just cranked my insecurities up a lot. I just wish he never told me," she concluded.
Users in the comments section tried to ease the woman's insecurities.
"You are a few years younger than him, you were an adult for about [two years] when you got together, and he for about [five]. So he's had two and a half times the opportunity. But could have also been sexually active earlier depending on laws, etc.," one person wrote.
"Something I try to keep in mind is not only did they choose you, all those people who came before you may have played some part (big or small) in making the person you know and love who they are. Sometimes it can help to step back from the insecurities and jealousy, and just appreciate the past experiences they've had because those experiences are a part of them. That's not to say you can't still feel insecure, but it always helped me to look at it in a more positive way," another chimed in.
"I think it’s normal to be a little sad about it. My 'count' is way higher than my husband’s (not that either of us care) and sometimes I still get sad when I think about women before me. Which really doesn’t make a whole lot of sense and is kind of hypocritical, but we don’t get to choose our feelings! Of course, I’d never say anything to him or make him feel bad in any way. The older you get, the less a 'body count' really matters. What matters is that you love each other now," someone else commented.
Celebrities Who Waited Until Marriage
Gallery Credit: Jacklyn Krol