Season 5 of Game of Thrones is just around the corner! We've already toasted the series by testing our GoT trivia knowledge in the latest episode of You Think You Know TV? Then we ranked the series' leading ladies by their level of badass. And today we're celebrating the crushes who've come — and who've gone — on the riveting and often bloody HBO fantasy epic. But hey, no fear, newbies! Though the night is dark and full of terrors, our list of the hottest heroes (and villains) on Game of Thrones is light on spoilers.
Joffrey Baratheon (Jack Gleeson)
On a good day, the boy who became king looks like Westeros' Justin Bieber. But a good day for Joffrey is generally a horrendous day for everyone else. This creep's penchant for inflicting pain on others for his own perverse pleasure earns him the bottom spot on our crushable list. Oh, Joff, don't get choked up about it!
Jojen Reed (Thomas Brodie-Sangster)
With that baby face, it's hard to believe Brodie-Sangster (who you might remember from Love Actually) is actually 24 years old. As the oft-dreaming Jojen, this Brit boy was pretty dreamy. But with so little screen time, this greensighted guy didn't hook us quite the way his colleagues did.
Jorah Mormont (Iain Glen)
Jorah's unrequited crush on Daenerys Targaryen, Mother of Dragons, has urged Thrones fans to give him the mocking moniker "Sir Friend-Zone." Dany might not be interested in this disgraced noble, but his brooding appeal still has us pulling for their unlikely May-December romance.
Daario Naharis (Ed Skrein/Michiel Huisman)
When Dany deigned to hook up with one of her subjects, she ignored poor Jorah in favor of this swaggering sellsword. But ranking Daario's hotness is tricky since he got a major makeover between Seasons 3 and 4 courtesy of recasting.
The debate of who's a hotter Daario rages on. While we favor Michiel Huisman's beardy brand of hotness (not to mention dat ass), Daario's arrogance during Ed Skrein's era is enough to get him bumped down to lower rankings.
Jaqen H'ghar (Tom Wlaschiha)
From the moment he entered the arc of Arya Stark, there was something about this mysterious warrior that made our hearts — and hers — skip a beat. Part of it was that he seemed a little two-faced, sometimes literally. But ultimately, this bad boy won us over with his daring-do and roguish charms. We miss your face, Jaqen!
Arya's other crush started off as a moody blacksmith's apprentice, but as the two journeyed together, oh, how this bastard Baratheon has grown! We're not sure what lies ahead for Gendry, but we're hoping for more shirtlessness.
Podrick Payne (Daniel Portman)
Podrick entered the series as a bit of a bumbling joke, meant to win only the ire of his master, Tyrion Lannister. But over the seasons, Pod has proved loyal, sweet and brave. Also, his trip to Littlefinger's brothel taught us all that Pod has admirable skills beyond the battlefield.
Grey Worm (Jacob Anderson)
The leader of Dany's Unsullied army, Grey Worm's unfortunate name wouldn't be the only drawback to having him as a beau. Nonetheless, we go weak in the knees when he focuses those beautiful dark eyes on his would-be lady love Missandei. Here's hoping their romance heats up this season!
Jaime Lannister (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau)
Okay, Jaime has some major drawbacks. From episode one, he's been shown to be a brutal soldier in service to his House. And his relationship with sister Cersei is beyond a red flag. But he's carving out an intriguing redemption arc through his friendship with Brienne of Tarth. And besides: Look at that face!
Jon Snow (Kit Harrington)
Being the illegitimate son of House Stark, Jon has a chip on his shoulder the size of King's Landing. Despite his occasional wet blanket boohooing, he's a truly good guy — something hard to come by in Westeros. We could get lost in those dark locks for hours. And as his wildling lover Ygritte revealed, Jon's an accomplished kisser.
Loras Tyrell (Finn Jones)
Between that smile, those curls and his chivalrous showmanship, we've been fangirling hard along Sansa over The Knight of The Flowers. Too bad for Sansa, she's not this Rainbow Guard member's type.
Robb Stark (Richard Madden)
No wonder Richard Madden was cast to play Prince Charming in Cinderella. Whether he's draped in lush velvet, worn leather or fierce fur, there is something distinctly regal about this Stark hunk. Plus watching him follow his heart over his head — ultimately not a winning strategy — is pretty charming on its own.
His meet-cute with wife Dany was anything but cute, more a barbaric bargain than romance. But remarkably their arranged marriage blossomed into some of the series' hottest scenes. And even in Dothraki subtitles, his calling Dany "Moon of my life" makes our hearts melt for this blood-thirsty brute.
Tyrion Lannister (Peter Dinklage)
For three seasons this imp was not just a fan favorite, but regularly regarded as the most crush-worthy castmember the series had to offer. Partially because Tyrion — with his love of women, wine and good conversation — was tons more fun than his conniving companions. His struggle to survive have cut down his shenanigans, transforming Tyrion from sexy scoundrel to unlikely hero. Yet Dinklage's charisma shines bright even in his darkest scenes. Not even an axe to the face can kill our crush on this little lion.
Oberyn Martell (Pedro Pascal)
From the moment he sauntered into Season 4, our collective jaws were on the floor taking in the outrageous allure of Oberyn Martell. His sexual appetite is diverse and insatiable. His sultry Spanish accent transforms every line into song. His long vibrant robes add swagger to every step. And true to the word and Game of Thrones, this crush crushed us by season's end.