Selena Gomez proves herself to be a consummate actress in her Funny or Die parody of the erotic relationship novel 'Fifty Shades of Grey,' which is all the literary rage right now. In the soap opera-style short 'Fifty Shades of Blue,' Sel falls hard for Carl, a gnarly house painter. He is no fine artiste!

Gomez is enamored by him from the get go -- but trust us, he's no Justin Bieber. With the bulging bumps on his face and nasty, dirty overalls, he is not a catch and lacks manners, but the teen is totally into him.

With her pouty lips and distant, vacant stare, the 'Who Says' singer emotes like a Lifetime movie siren, aroused by his paint sealer and turned on by the way he put the sheets on the floor.

He shows her the inside of his van, which Gomez mistakes for a bonding moment, all the while biting her glossy lip. He refers to her as "husky" and says she has a "thick frame," asking her to carry his stuff. Of course, Gomez swoons, but he is oblivious and gross.

He asks for her signature on the bill. She leaves her digits, 'Call Me Maybe' style. She draws hearts and Xs and Os, which he ignores. He notes that for a quiet girl, she "full on creeped me out."

Creep! And hilarious. Gomez ends the video admiring his botched paint job. Lust will make you blind, kiddies.

Watch the Selena Gomez 'Fifty Shades of Blue' Funny or Die Video

Watch Selena Gomez Behind-the-Scenes of 'Fifty Shades of Blue'