Mother Refuses to Reveal Which of Her Two Babies Is Adopted

A new mother refuses to reveal which baby is her biological child and which baby was adopted.

In a viral Reddit thread, a single 20-year-old first-time mother adopted a baby girl who was born three days before her biological daughter. In the post, she used the name Rose to describe her biological daughter while the name Lily is the daughter she adopted.

"I got pregnant with Rose about the same time that my best friend who I'll call Anna got pregnant with Lily," she began. "While I was ecstatic about being pregnant, Anna was not." The new mom explained that her friend believed that she wasn't in the right place to care for a child and was considering an abortion but that "she wished her child could have a good life somewhere else, instead of 'just being thrown away.'" However, she also considered the horror stories of abusive adoptive parents. The friends came up with a "hesitant" plan, if after Lily was born, Anna didn't believe that she could be a mother to her, she would adopt Lily and raise their daughters as twins.

Anna did not want Lily to know that she was adopted, so the friends decided that when Lily was old enough, she would tell her that was adopted in addition to revealing Anna as her biological mother, if Anna felt comfortable with it at the time of the reveal.

For the birth of Rose, the new mother didn't have any of her family in the room during the birth, only Anna. Anna would also become both Lily and Rose's godmother. When the original poster returned home with both girls, she had her family come and visit to meet the children.

"As soon as my grandmother met my babies she asked me which one was my daughter, and I replied that they both were. She rolled her eyes and said that I knew what she meant, I told her that, no I don't because they are both my daughters," she recalled.

The grandmother asked again which was her "real daughter," and the new mom's parents even agreed that they should know which daughter is her biological child.

"I got mad and asked them why it mattered, both babies are my children, I'm breast feeding both of them, I named both of them, and I was there through the entire pregnancy for both of them, even if I only carried one of them myself," she explained.

The mother ended up fighting with her family, neither party wanted to budge. Her parents told the new mom that was being "dramatic, pointlessly stubborn, ridiculous, and that they just wanted to know when dealing with the girls which one was their granddaughter." When they said that, the new mom kicked them out and promised that they wouldn't see either of the girls until they apologized.

"After they left I sent out a text saying that I will tell them which one is adopted when I explain to her that she is adopted, but adopted or not they are both my children," she added. "I also reiterated that until I get an apology, and they agree to view my daughters equally, they will not see the girls and I will not be talking to them."

The response from her family to her text ranged from demands to see the children, to calling her cruel names, accusing her of depriving her daughters of love and begging to know which is her biological daughter. She ended up blocking those family members who kept pestering her, including her brother and mother. Her own mother told her that "no one was going to help me take care of the children until I told them them the truth about which is my real daughter."

The new mom gave an update to her original post and confirmed that everyone knew that Anna was pregnant at the same time, though she and Anna have similar traits, making it close to impossible to tell which child she gave birth to. The anonymous mom revealed that Lily hasn't been formally adopted, just that Lily is her child and staying at her house, while Anna is her legal guardian. The women are trying to discover where Lily's father currently is located and determine the best time to tell Lily that she is adopted.